Thursday, January 19, 2012

Some thougths about people who have died, and odd things that happen.

I have two voicemail messages from Tina still that I keep saving on my phone. I also recorded them to my computer. I hope I remember to save them every few days so that I can listen to her anytime. They are sweet reminders of things she always said to me on the phone.

My dad died in '88 and I still randomly cry about him, and also my brother who died in 2000, and my sis-in-law who died in '81 or "83.... She was one of my best friends in High School when I lived with Tina, even before she married my brother. Sometimes I can talk about any of them, and many others, and not cry, other times I just think about them and tears flow.

Something strange I haven't told a lot of people.... We were in Houston for New Year's and I woke up early that morning before the alarm went off. I don't recall the time now, I just know it was early. Then on Monday morning, I was sleeping in the guest room because I was so exhausted and E snores. I woke up really early, around 6:40 thinking someone had come into the room, but E was snoring in the other room, and I didn't see anyone. Every morning I wake up at that same time before my alarm goes off at 7:00. Only that one morning did I feel like someone was in the room. When my grandmother died, she came to Tina and sat on the foot of her bed and told her that everything was going to be alright. Tina was her favorite. I wonder now if Tina came to me that first morning after she died. Another odd thing... when my dad died, I didn't know it but when I got to the hospital I found out that it was the exact minute that I had awakened that morning, before the alarm went off. I had planned to get up and go to the hospital. I'm wondering now if Tina died at 6:40 in the morning. I didn't think about that until this morning. We'll see if I keep waking up at the same time, or if I won't now that I've figured that out. Wonder what the autopsy will say. I doubt they can pinpoint the time that close. It doesn't matter what time I go to bed, I keep waking at that same time. Well, that's plenty to digest for now.

Anyway, there will always be a connection and if you haven't read the book, Heaven Is For Real, I highly recommend it. It's one of my fav books since I read it about 6 months ago. I'm going to read it again in the next few weeks. I'm taking it with me to two church women's retreats the first two weekends in February.

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Sad News

This has been the worst start to a New Year ever!
My niece found my sister/best friend, Tina, dead in her duplex on New Year's Day evening.
She had fallen Christmas Eve day and broke her arm just below the right shoulder. At the hospital, they put it in a sling strapped to her body and sent her home with a scrip for pain. Said they couldn't cast it because of where the break was until the swelling went down and that she should see her ortho doc. She had an appt scheduled for Jan. 2nd. We don't know yet what happened to her. She was diabetic and had some heart issues, so it was probably a combination of those. They said 6-8 weeks to get reports back that may give us a better idea of what happened.

She was my best friend even tho 9 years older. We did many things together. We emailed several times a day and talked on the phone several times each week. I miss her so much.

We had her memorial service on Jan. 7th. I'm amazed that I got through my talk when the family shared. Luckily, my brother and Tina's two sons let me go first. I pretty much read what I had typed, or I wouldn't have made it through.
It was heartwarming to see so many of her family and friends take one of the pigs from her collection as a memento. She collected them the 20 years she worked for APD, and even in the 3 years since she retired. Many of the people showed me the pig they chose and told me why. I wish I could remember all the stories.

The first week of January was the worst week of my life so far. I know there will be more of those. It's just what happens as we get older. I just have to take each day as it comes, and be thankful to have had the time I did with her. Rest in peace, sweet sister. I love you, and I know I will see you again.